Chapter 1: The Single Axis
*“Man is not worried by real problems so much as by his imagined anxieties about real problems.”* *— Epictetus*
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The Meeting That Never Ends
Every Monday at 10 AM, Sarah’s team gathers to discuss launching their product.
Three months now.
Same meeting. Same discussion. The product has been “two weeks from launch” since June.
Everyone in that room wants to ship. They talk about shipping. They make plans for shipping. They set deadlines for shipping.
But they don’t ship.
Ask them why and you’ll get sophisticated explanations:
Market conditions. Technical debt. Competitive analysis. Resource constraints. Risk mitigation. Quality standards.
These aren’t the real reasons.
The truth is simpler: they’re attracted to the idea of launching and repelled by the reality of launching. The forces are equal. So they stay suspended between wanting and doing, calling it “preparation.”
This isn’t a story about Sarah’s team.
It’s a story about *every* team. Every founder. Every product.
Every decision that matters.
Because everything that matters operates on the same single axis: **attract–repel**.
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The Physics Nobody Talks About
In 1687, Newton described gravity. In 1915, Einstein refined it.
Both were mapping forces that existed long before humans could name them.
The attract–repel principle is the same. Always there. Governing human behavior. Waiting to be recognized.
Check your domain registrar. Count them. Twenty? Thirty? Each one was 3 AM brilliance. Each one was going to change everything. $12 for the dopamine hit of feeling like a founder without founding anything. GoDaddy's entire business model is selling potential to people repelled by process.
Consider magnets. Same poles repel. Opposite poles attract.
Simple. Predictable. Measurable.
Now consider humans. We like to think we're more complex.
We're not.
Every decision is a calculation between attractive and repulsive forces:
* The job offer: Attracted to the salary, repelled by the commute. * The startup idea: Attracted to the potential, repelled by the risk. * The relationship: Attracted to intimacy, repelled by vulnerability. * The investment: Attracted to returns, repelled by loss. * The product launch: Attracted to success, repelled by judgment.
We dress this up with pros and cons lists. SWOT analyses. Risk assessments.
Strip it all away.
Two forces remain: Attract. Repel.
That’s it.
And the real insight isn’t that these forces exist.
It’s that they’re the *same* force.
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Why Everything Reduces to This
A venture capitalist once said, “Every startup fails for the same reason — they run out of money.”
But that’s wrong.
Every startup fails for the same reason — the founders become more repelled than attracted.
Watch any startup’s lifecycle:
Day 1: Maximum attraction. The idea is perfect. The future is bright. Nothing can stop us.
Month 3: First customer rejection. Repulsion appears, but attraction dominates.
Month 6: Technical challenges. Team friction. Repulsion grows, attraction holds.
Month 12: Runway shrinking. Competition emerging. Forces equalizing.
Month 18: The founders’ energy shifts. They’re still “working on it,” but repulsion has overtaken attraction.
Running out of money isn’t the cause. It’s the symptom.
When founders are more attracted than repelled, they find money. When they’re more repelled than attracted, they don’t.
This pattern repeats everywhere:
Corporate careers: Early employees are attracted to stability. Mid-career professionals get repelled by politics. The ones who thrive aren’t those without repulsion — they’re the ones who keep cultivating attraction.
Wealth accumulation: Everyone’s attracted to money. But the reality of wealth — responsibility, visibility, pressure — creates new repulsions. That’s why sudden wealth often disappears.
Personal development: We’re attracted to transformation, repelled by change. We buy the book (attraction). The exercises feel hard (repulsion). We attend the seminar (attraction). Implementation requires effort (repulsion).
Recognition is the first step to rebalancing.
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The Universality Nobody Wants to Admit
Here’s what makes people uncomfortable:
This principle applies to everything.
Not some things.
Everything.
Your marriage operates on attract–repel. Your health operates on attract–repel. Your creativity operates on attract–repel. Your beliefs operate on attract–repel. Your identity operates on attract–repel.
Take any area where you’re stuck.
Map the forces. You’ll find them in balance, keeping you frozen.
The creator who won’t create: Attracted to expression, repelled by judgment. The employee who won’t quit: Attracted to freedom, repelled by uncertainty. The founder who won’t pivot: Attracted to being right, repelled by admitting wrong. The investor who won’t invest: Attracted to returns, repelled by risk. The couple who won’t commit: Attracted to partnership, repelled by compromise.
We call this “weighing options,” “being strategic,” or “waiting for the right moment.”
It’s not.
It’s suspension between equal and opposite forces.
Recognizing this is where real choice begins.
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The Corporate Dance
Watch how this plays out in large organizations:
Innovation Theater: Companies say they want innovation (attraction) but punish failure (repulsion). So they create “innovation labs” — safe spaces with no risk. The labs produce nothing. Everyone pretends this is innovation.
Hiring Paradox: Managers claim they want independent thinkers (attraction) but hire people just like them (repulsion from difference). Nothing changes.
Meeting Culture: Teams want decisions (attraction) but fear being wrong (repulsion). So they have endless meetings. Illusion of progress, no movement.
Restructuring Cycles: Companies want efficiency (attraction) but fear disruption (repulsion). So they restructure just enough to look busy, never enough to change.
Every corporate dysfunction is an attract–repel dynamic in disguise.
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The Startup Delusion
Startups think they’re different. They’re not.
The same founder who rails against corporate bureaucracy creates it at 20 employees. Attracted to growth, repelled by chaos, they invent structure that achieves neither.
Airbnb began with strangers sleeping on air mattresses. Now it has more regulations than hotels.
Uber started as ridesharing. Now it’s a taxi company with an app.
Facebook launched to connect people. Now it’s the world’s largest advertising platform.
Success itself creates new repulsions. The disruptors become the disrupted — not because they failed, but because they succeeded.
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The Money Mirror
Nothing reveals attract–repel dynamics like money.
The freelancer who won’t raise rates: Attracted to more income, repelled by confrontation. The startup that won’t charge: Attracted to revenue, repelled by rejection. The employee who won’t negotiate: Attracted to a raise, repelled by risk. The founder who won’t sell: Attracted to exit money, repelled by letting go.
Then watch what happens when people get money:
The newly rich who can’t enjoy it: Attracted to wealth, repelled by guilt. The successful who sabotage themselves: Attracted to achievement, repelled by pressure. The wealthy who hoard: Attracted to security, repelled by visibility.
Money is just a mirror. It reflects your attract–repel dynamics back at you, magnified.
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Why Simple Truths Are Hardest to Accept
The attract–repel principle is stupidly simple.
That’s why you’ll resist it.
We assume complex problems require complex solutions. Entire industries profit from that assumption — consulting firms, business schools, certification programs.
If everything really does reduce to attract–repel, then:
* Your MBA was overpriced. * Your consultant is overpaid. * Your framework is overcomplicated. * Your excuse is overengineered.
That stings, doesn’t it?
But here’s the attractive part:
If everything reduces to attract–repel, you finally understand why:
* You know what to do but don’t do it. * Success feels empty. * Simple changes feel impossibly hard. * You repeat patterns you recognize and hate.
The principle doesn’t solve your problems.
It reveals them.
And revelation, uncomfortable as it is, is the first step.
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The Pattern Behind All Patterns
Every stuck pattern follows the same sequence:
1. **Attraction:** Something appeals to you. 2. **Repulsion:** You discover what it requires. 3. **Balance:** Forces equalize. 4. **Rationalization:** You explain why you’re not moving. 5. **Suspension:** You stay stuck, calling it something else.
This feels like progress — like planning, like strategizing.
It’s not. It’s suspension.
The entrepreneur “validating” for two years isn’t validating. The couple “working on things” for five years isn’t working. The employee “looking for something better” for a decade isn’t looking.
They’re suspended.
And suspension only breaks when one force overwhelms the other.
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The Uncomfortable Truth About Change
Real change happens when:
* Attraction becomes so strong repulsion is irrelevant. * Or repulsion becomes so strong movement is mandatory.
There’s no other way.
This is why people only leave jobs when they’re miserable, not when they’re unsatisfied. Why startups pivot when they’re dying, not when they’re struggling. Why health habits stick after a scare, not after advice.
We rarely change because we *should*.
We change when we understand the forces at play — and shift their balance.
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The Question You Won’t Answer
So here’s where I’ll leave you:
What in your life has been “about to happen” for more than six months?
The thing you’re “working on.” The decision you’re “considering.” The change you’re “planning.” The conversation you’re “preparing for.” The launch you’re “finalizing.”
You know what it is.
You thought of it the moment you read that question.
Now map the forces.
What attracts you? What repels you?
Be specific. Be honest.
Chances are, they’re balanced.
And you’ve been calling that balance by another name: strategy, planning, caution, patience.
It isn’t.
It’s suspension.
Naming it accurately is where your power begins.
And that recognition — uncomfortable as it might be — is your first step toward movement.